TESTIMONY By Imago Dei

TESTIMONY

So I faced the truth today:

I’d finally hit a brick wall.

I stood face to face with reality, and it made me upset.

But there was no longer any denying it:

I didn’t know everything…

Couldn’t know everything…

Couldn’t control everything…

AND I WAS AFRAID…

Afraid of my shadow.

Afraid of commitment.

Afraid of the mystery

That is my Future.

But the good thing?

…That at the end of the alley,

at this very dead end I’d come to,

and on that very brick wall I now faced,

a sign was suspended.

It was written in vivid red blood,

on a background of pure, white righteousness,

and with gentle direction, it read:

“You might’ve strayed, and reached this wall,

But you can always turn back.

Your exit is from whence you came…”

I faced the truth today:

That I’m OKAY!

…even if I didn’t know everything…

couldn’t know everything…

couldn’t control everything,

It’s ok to be afraid

but it’s even better to admit it

for HIS strength is made perfect in weakness…

So though my heart thumps violently in my chest,

and my confidence drops at the uncertainty of my future,

I will stand…

in faith…

on His word and promises,

Hand him my fears on the platter of my heart,

Blind my eyes to the turbulence around me,

And scream from the pit of my lungs:

I AM NOT AFRAID!!!

…of my shadow

…nor commitment

…nor the mystery that lies ahead.

I AM NOT AFRAID OF MY FUTURE!

⁹But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest on me. ¹⁰That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12: 9-10)

-       IMAGO DEI

A good girl

I was a good girl. At least, by many people's standards I was. I was born into a Christian home and grew up in Church. Growing up, 'God', 'Bible' and 'prayer' were not strange words to me. I was an active child in Sunday School. I always enjoyed being in plays and presentations at church especially when I was the 'star'. Bible recitations were probably one of my favorite activities. I was a smart child (still am, Thank God!) and for my age, was very good at memorizing Bible verses. Bible recitations were the best avenues to "wow" the mummies and daddies. Looking back, I probably did not have any ulterior motive for participating in those presentations but I must have enjoyed the attention.

I was a good girl. I did the right things, got the right grades and made friends, for the most part, with the right people. My life was pretty good. And then came those years when your mind tricks you into believing you're old enough to run your life. The rebellion kicked in slowly. It started with minor grievances with my parents -most of which I did not really voice out because if I did, I might have been rude. Now that would have been bad, you see, I was a good girl. Then it escalated to angry words and hot tears burning with anger over something they did or did not do- like not letting me wear the clothes I wanted. The anger continued to grow and would often invite loneliness and sadness. Together, they would have a feast on my insides, leaving me hollow and empty. Still, I was a good girl. I was able to whip out my dimples on many occasions, masking the sadness within. I pulled off the facade really nicely but one person was not deceived - my mum.

I was a good girl; everyone but my mum knew that. She saw right through me, like a good mother would. She tried to talk but I shut her off emotionally. She was the one with the wrong perspective and the restrictive views about who she wanted me to be. Though I was adamant, she refused to let me go. How could she? Her daughter was a very good girl going to a very real hell. Luckily, this good girl's mother was a praying woman. With tears in my eyes, I can imagine my mum on her knees, crying to God to save her daughter. I can imagine her going to weep before God, every time we had a hurtful conversation. I knew I was hurting her but I was not sorry. Why should I have been? I was a good girl.

Good but empty, I depended on compliments and people's opinions about me to keep me happy. I sought companionship and was happy when I found it. I loved my friends a lot (I still do). I may not have known it, but I was looking for love - not the "butterfly-in-your-tummy" kind that ends but the deep, long-lasting one that never fails. Yet, in my quest for love, I turned away from the only One who could ever love me the way I needed - God. But this good girl had a praying mother. For a long time, I was satisfied with mediocre love - the kind that fades with time. I was like Prophet Hosea's prostitute-wife (Hosea 1-3), running away from my True Love.

On the 15th of July, 2008, this good girl finally went for the real thing. That night, on the floor in my room, I allowed the Lover of my soul, Jesus, to love me. I accepted His love and asked Him to come into my heart. He did!

Today, this good girl isn't just good anymore. She's righteous by reason of Jesus' blood! Goodness without Christ won't get you anywhere. Allow him to love you today. Accept Jesus into your heart. Ask Him to cleanse you with His blood and make you free and whole. Don't wait till you feel you are lovable - that day will never come! Accept His grace today. He loves you just as you are. He loves you so much!

This righteous girl is Christian because she has found True Love in her Savior, Jesus!

I leave you with this verse from the song, How He Love Us by Kim Walker

He is jealous for me

Love's like a hurricane,

I am a tree

Bending beneath the weight of

His wind and mercy

When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory

and I realize just how beautiful You are and how great your affections are for me

Child of Promise is Christian because...

So I said I was going to put up the Facebook note. Here it is:

For many years of my life, I stumbled in darkness. Sin is like a black hole, without help, one would simply sink deeper. For many years, I was in this black hole called Sin, sinking yet not wanting any help. I had grown accustomed to the darkness- I liked it! But deep within, because I had been brought up in God's Word, I knew there was something much better than darkness. I knew there was light. I knew there was Jesus -THE light. At times, I would try hard to get to the light on my own but I never could. I prayed and read my Bible, most of the time still in sin, but praying and reading the Bible alone don't save you. One night, God made me see how much darkness was around me. He opened my eyes to see the error of my ways and the emptiness of religion, which tells you that your good works can save you or that going to church, praying or reading your Bible can save you. God didn't do this to condemn me. Oh not at all!! My God loves me!! As soon as I called out to Him, He reached out and pulled me out of the hole. I needed a Savior and being the only True Savior, Jesus stepped in. His blood washed me clean of all my sins (and still does) and God put His Holy Spirit in me.

I'm Christian because God loves me. He sent His Son to die for the sins of the world, forgiving them and making it possible for everyone to be reconciled with Him. I accepted this forgiveness and so I'm reconciled with God. I'm righteous; In fact, I have been made "the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus" (2 Corinthians 5:21). I'm Christian because I love God and everyday, in His strength, I live for Him. I'm Christian because I'm saved by grace (Ephesians 2:8) and by the blood of Jesus. I'm Christian because God's Holy Spirit lives in me (1 Timothy 1:14, 2 Corinthians 1:22), loving me, directing me and keeping me (John 14:26, John 16:13). I'm Christian because "my life is hid in Christ in God" (Colossians 3:3). I love Him because He first loved me (1 John 4:19).